Who is Cactus Jack? Nice of you to ask… Cactus Jack is the relationship that taught me the most; the one that almost killed me; the one that made me strong.
The saddest thing about what I’m about to say is how many of you will actually relate to it;
“I’ve never been so lonely then in a relationship with you.”
Oh hell! Who knows what I’m taking about?
Constantly feeling like you’re being compared, never being good enough, always having to change who you are, and fighting for acceptance?
I feel like there is this myth that only women go through this and all men are somehow heartless, but the truth is assholes come in every sex or whatever you identify as. Some people hang onto you like a leech sucking you dry while they have their eyes on “something better.” Let me just tell you now – RELAX, it happens to the best of us… twice even. People are broken and they look for their own brokenness in other people to fix, that’s why we make such extravagant messes of our lives and when you are younger with raging hormones and two brain cells firing it’s even worse.
So what now? Do we need to find someone who is not broken? Hahahahahahahahaha! No…
People like that do no exist but what I think can help is if we just start thinking with our heads and then give some room for our hearts to sort through the emotions because hearts are a fickle thing. Just take it easy and take it slow. Someone who really wants to be with you will be patient. Somewhere in this world is someone who is dying to meet you just as you are. It sounds fairytale crazy but the truth is – its not, because we all might share similarities but there are some unique things about you that will just make you worth it to the right person and that is something I’m sure some smart science guy can explain to us but just believe me… I’m totally unqualified which makes me perfect to comment on this!
Look… get out of the bad relationship, I know it’s scary but do it. Don’t stay in a place where you are treated like less than a person just because you exist, that’s some bullshit and you know it. Leave, please leave. Just take your stuff and go! Sometimes no plan is also a plan. Take some time to be alone because alone is not always lonely and you will never ever get your alone time back or make decisions on your own once you commit to someone because commit means I WILL NEVER STOP DATING YOU OR WORKING AT IT EVEN AFTER WE ARE MARRIED! Don’t ever stop dating your partner that is the biggest mistake people make – keep it fresh.
The biggest lesson Cactus Jack taught me is that I now know exactly WHAT I DO NOT WANT. That might sound silly but when it comes to people and their habits and what I will accept in my life it makes the biggest difference. Take the lessons not the failures and then grow… grow and love again – wisely Susan!
Anyway what do I know, I’m just over here sharing my craziness
Keep safe you guys, till next time xxx